a life of regurgitation

So....today at BSF our teaching leader made this comment that has struck me so funny and yet SO true!....it has set my mind to thinking! ALOT!

"After you are regurgitated you are wiser!"...now I know you are thinking....what kind of bible study are you in?....?....? But hang w/ me for a minute! We are in Matthew 12 and it has a reference to the OT in it, which is about Jonah and his time in the belly of the big fish. So she made the comment in reference to Jonah being wiser about obeying God after he first disobeyed! and I thought WOW....how many times have I looked back and realized my disobedience....after I had been regurgitated...after I had to learn some hard consquences. I know for me I can look back at the last year and realize that there was alot of "regurgitations" I went through and I am sure God will tell the big fish to spit me out again in the future....but hopefully I will be able to remember this funny phase and realized that I need to lean on God for help and answers before I even find myself in the belly of another fish. How often I walk forward...thinking....I know what I am doing, yet God is calling to me, telling me to go the opposite direction from where "I" am choosing to go....yet He every time will send my storm and then my "big fish" to stop me where I am and tell me again (when He has me in a place I am ready to listen to Him) what HIS desires are for me!....isn't it amazing that He loves us all that much to do this for us over and over until we learn...
My questions to myself and to you is....What is your "big fish?" What is swallowing you up...stopping you in your tracks....waiting for you to release it to our Heavenly Father....preventing you from going to the next step of faith?...What has you eaten right where you are...that you need to let go of, so that you can be released back into the arms of Jesus and His desires for your life....what is it that God called you to do that you are running from....and b/c you are running the other way there are storms in your life...storms that effect you and others around you....storms that will cause others to cast you overboard and into the mouth of the big fish? What is it that you need to stop running from today so that the "big fish" can regurgitate you and you can continue on forward in God's will?

"Thank you Jesus, for regurgitating me...over and over again....and for not allowing the big fish to just eat me as I deserve! I love you...You are an awesome teacher"

DISCLAIMER: Sorta sad I feel the need for this....this in no way reflects teaching from BSF....this is only what I felt God speaking to me from the lesson I heard. I know some may read this and think I am nutcase and that's ok too!....it's not for you, but more for me, and my need to express what I am learning/hearing from God. LOL....God know's my heart!